Ahhh Love…

14 Feb

Happy Valentines Day all! I never take this holiday too seriously, but I suppose it’s never bad to be reminded that you should spend time or be extra appreciative of your loved one.. With that said, I wanted to post a few thoughts on love. Being that I am an unlikely statistic (married at 18 and still going 6 years later), I wanted to share my take on how to make things work in relationships.

The number one reason for divorce is financial disagreement. Money cannot buy love or a good marriage for that matter. The ingredients of a good marriage include communication, trust and love. Obtain all of these things with a person and it will result in a good relationship or marriage.

Most everyone will testify that communication is the key to a successful relationship. Yet most of these people will throw that idea out the window when a real argument sets in. When relationships grow into marriage, the ‘serious factor’ begins to weigh down. Spouses tend to get tired of each other because it becomes more routine than desire. Not speaking to one another can cause couples’ petty arguments to escalate to an all out fight. These problems can be avoided early on by keeping the lines of communication open.

Trust is usually a characteristic that is earned, or even expected over a length of time. At a stage as serious as marriage, you might assume that trust is a given factor. However, some people still have trouble trusting their spouses, even after they’ve said their vows. This is not a sign of a good marriage. Trust is something that should be established in the dating stage. Marriage should only confirm trust, not test it. If a person is not trusting their spouse, it is probably because they themselves are not trustworthy. Positive thoughts and actions attract the like, and so it goes for negative. If someone is trusting, they are more likely to have a trusting spouse. This is a great starting point for building trust together, instead of just within themselves.

Love is a worn out term that is tossed around to describe many things. In a good marriage, it entails understanding, selflessness, reasoning skills, patience and faith. A spouse is more than just a husband or a wife, they are a best friend. A special bond must be formed between two people that goes way beyond the gushy stuff. To connect with a person on a higher level of intellect, to understand their faults, to be able to reason with them, to have patience and faith, is love. It is such a complex term that is unable to be rightly defined. Love is something you feel, not a term that is only to be defined by other mere terms. If love is truly shared between two people, it will surely result in a good marriage.

Considering that every couple has a unique situation,there may be times when some of the ingredients are there, and some are missing. Love may be obvious while communications is absent. Or trust may be prominent and love is dissolving. If couples are unafraid to examine the truth in their relationships, they can figure out whether communication, trust, or any areas of love are out of sync. Once they find out the problem, they can begin working on the solution. The effort of trying is the first of many steps to a good, lasting marriage.

I am so appreciative of my valentine today and everyday. My best friend, my rock, my husband. Thank you for enduring, motivating, loving, caring, and allowing me to do the same!


2 Responses to “Ahhh Love…”

  1. ajpomales February 14, 2012 at 9:29 pm #

    Another beautiful writeup. Your talent for words and expressing self equal your talent for design, to say the least. Keep up the inspiring, honest work!



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